My Book
Expecting It All: More Time, Money, Energy, and Space for Mothers
In 2019, I gave birth to a lovely baby girl and then promptly sank into postpartum depression. For the first two years of my child’s life, I spent a lot of time lying on the floor unable to move because of my depression. When I wasn’t gazing blankly up at the ceiling, my thoughts were consumed by finding ways to give my daughter more vegetables or determining what counted as “too much screen time.” The only self-care that interested me was figuring out how to lose the 15 pounds I had gained during my pregnancy.
I thought that was normal. I thought that was what motherhood is about.
Fortunately, I eventually emerged from that state of depression. However, what continued to drag me down was the weight of motherhood’s responsibilities. The stacks of dishes and laundry demanded nightly energy to clear. The continuous soundbites from my child simultaneously warmed my heart and frayed my nerves. The financial commitment needed to clothe, feed, shelter, transport, entertain, and educate my child.
At the day’s end, there was scarcely anything remaining for my own well-being.
The journey to self-discovery required a substantial amount of emotional labor and planning. Some of the planning tools I had once used in childfree times were no longer applicable. In response, I crafted my own ad-hoc tools and Frankenstein-ed others. As I pieced everything together, I documented the outcomes which is the origin of this book.
My Path to Writing
In January 2023, I decided to write a book.
Each year, I jot down a few things I would like to do in my life (e.g. travel the world, learn a language, start a non-profit, and become CFO of a company). Writing a book has always been part of that list, but I didn’t know where to start—I didn’t even know what type of book I wanted to write.
What finally got me started was when I realized I’ve read over 1,000 children’s books to my daughter Rosie. One thousand books—that was what it took for me to give myself the permission to write. Once I granted myself that permission, I found that I’d like to write a book about motherhood for mothers instead.
From that initial thought, I learned how to build a first draft, find and work with beta readers, improve my writing, and find a publisher. If you’re interested in writing a book and want to know what it takes to get published, then hop over to my Instagram page to follow my author’s journey. Or stick around here to read my blog posts (coming soon!) on techniques for writing and publishing a book.
My book is still on its publishing journey. A lot of brilliant editors are taking out their hacksaws so we can put all the nonsense pieces together and create something more fit for public consumption. The tentative publication date is Spring 2024.